FBI Recruiting Moles To Infiltrate "Vegan Potlucks" To Root Out Terrorists At RNC Convention

In preparation for the Republican National Convention, the FBI is soliciting informants to keep tabs on local protest groups
Moles Wanted

By Matt Snyders
http://www.ignet.gov/pande/standards/prgexhibitg.pdf

Apparently, Minneapolis' Joint Terrorist Task Force is recruiting people to infiltrate vegan potlucks to look for potential--what?--tahini enthusiasts?--in advance of the RNC convention this fall.

...............................

Paul Carroll was riding his bike when his cell phone vibrated.



When Carroll called back, Swanson asked him to meet at a coffee shop later that day, going on to assure a wary Carroll that he wasn’t in trouble.

Carroll, who requested that his real name not be used, showed up early and waited anxiously for Swanson’s arrival. Ten minutes later, he says, a casually dressed Swanson showed up, flanked by a woman whom he introduced as FBI Special Agent Maureen E. Mazzola. For the next 20 minutes, Mazzola would do most of the talking.

“She told me that I had the perfect ‘look,’” recalls Carroll. “And that I had the perfect personality—they kept saying I was friendly and personable—for what they were looking for.”

What they were looking for, Carroll says, was an informant—someone to show up at “vegan potlucks” throughout the Twin Cities and rub shoulders with RNC protestors, schmoozing his way into their inner circles, then reporting back to the FBI’s Joint Terrorism Task Force, a partnership between multiple federal agencies and state and local law enforcement. The effort’s primary mission, according to the Minneapolis division’s website, is to “investigate terrorist acts carried out by groups or organizations which fall within the definition of terrorist groups as set forth in the current United States Attorney General Guidelines.”

http://articles.citypages.com/2008-05-21/news/moles-wanted/
http://emptywheel.firedoglake.com/2008/05/21/in-minneapolis-vegan-terrorist/#more-2183

Terrorists, the lot of them, I tell you.

Oh, wait...hold on...that's not what I meant.

you must be a terrorist

And it depends who you ask.

Shhh.

what a freakin' joke.
do they really have nothing better to do?

into your life it will creep...

Everyone knows vegans are dangerous subversives. :rofl:

The are "others" of course.

As the Chevon VP said today during testimony before the US Senate, "a lot of my friends are ORDINARY people."

It is those who consider themselves the EXTRA-ORDINARY who must be feared!!

Pot Noodle ?

meets with Party Operatives in the Cone of Silence to work on the super-secret, eyes-only, Operation Chaos. Plans to destroy Denver are being finalized to be broadcast to the Dittoheads via radio waves while Agent Mike and 99 tofu on.

A graphic novel? Really, they need to lay off the comic books and get some serious shit done.

the steamed broccoli goes limp... I say again, the steamed broccoli goes limp

Code Soy! Code Soy!

Damn bunch of Maxwell Smart wanna-bes.

Dear Sirs:

I would like to be considered for the job of Vegan Potluck Informant which I recently saw posted on www.monster.com As you will note from my resume, I have many years of experience attending church potlucks and figuring out the theological orientation of various members based upon the particular recipes and what they choose to eat at the potluck. It is a short step from theological to political orientation.

Although I am not a vegan, I have eaten vegan prepared meals without making faces, and I believe that I could perform this successfully for the sake of protecting my country from terrorism.

I give good shoulder rubs and have been told I am an excellent schmooze, especially when food is around. Please review my qualifications and contact me for an interview at your earliest convenience.

undeterred

i'd hire you in a heartbeat. (not that i'm f.b.i.--it's just that i'd love a really good shoulder rub)

Maybe they weren't saying "vegans," but were saying "venucians." You know how it is. Easy mistake to make. :shrug:

They think Vegans are from Vega!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vega

:dem:

"This is all part of a larger government effort to quell political dissent,” says Jordan Kushner, an attorney who represented Ganley and other Critical Mass arrestees. “The Joint Terrorism Task Force is another example of using the buzzword ‘terrorism’ as a basis to clamp down on people’s freedoms and push forward a more authoritarian government.”

I would be very surprised if this didn't begin with some Bush appointee (though ordinary cops are prone to such stupid tactics as well). This puts me in mind of the Liberty University grad appointed to the the DoJ who stripped a US attorney of responsibility for some sex abuse cases because she had thought she was a lesbian.

It just goes to show how stupid they are. Of course all the vegans are organizing the protests! Rule by stereotype. I see so many Republican bumper stickers at our local whole foods it's not even funny. Meanwhile, the really dangerous types are hanging out at flight schools and shooting ranges, with nary a care in the world, knowing that no one's looking for them while they've got vegans on their plate.

Congress needs to investigate this now.

It's a great place to know if you want to buy a $20 bottle of organic wine, or some obscure artisinal cheese that smells like feet, but after you take away all the space they use for the prepackaged crap and the happy meet and the dairy, there's really not much more good vegan stuff than at a decent conventional grocer. It's a great place to find the elusive "crunchy cons," but not a very good place to shop if you're herbivorous. (Edit: And their produce selection SUCKS. Mostly shipped in from who knows where, half of it's conventional, and it's all expensive.)

Our local WF is the same way- the parking lot is full of bigass luxury cars and SUVs, and they all had Bush stickers before that became unfashionable. Or local co-op is the opposite, bikes and small cars, more leftish bumper stickers than you can shake a soy jerky stick at, and more vegan stuff in a store that's maybe a quarter of the size. Needless to say, I run into way more vegans there.

That so much that started out back in the 1970's among hairy liberals has become just another form of conspicuous consumption. I only shop there for a few things. The staff are way friendlier than the customers, but it's waay too expensive to be my regular grocery store.

i'm only saying this once:

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When will Congress crack down on vegetable use?

In trying to recruit an informant, the FBI told him that he "would be compensated for his efforts, but only if his involvement yielded an arrest."

Until I read that sentence, I was thinking, "Well, this is pretty silly, but maybe it would be a good thing to have someone 'infiltrate' and then reassure the FBI that no one talked about assassinations or suicide bombing or such. Perhaps the FBI might calm down a little. There's no big harm if my tax dollars are used to help increase the attendance at vegan potlucks in Minnesota."

But they're paying off only if the informant incriminates someone. They're setting it up to give these people every incentive to lie, or at least to misconstrue casual remarks evincing hostility to Bush.

That really stinks.

They could hire moles to rub noses with DNC protesters at all you can eat buffets, pig roasts and NRA rallies. The money compensation should be a lot higher, though, because the work environment is so much more repulsive.

the ones being prosecuted these days.

are all the new hippies.

If you're not a red meat only, tobacco spiting, four wheeling redneck then you're a terrorist.

Vegan potluckers, heads up, yo. But seriously, I'm glad the guy went to the media about it and got the word out. People need to understand that they're being watched, and played.

Oh, and I like the idea of applying for the job! Maybe we should all send the MPD fake resumes for this. Make a nice little headache for them.

I've looked at the recipes for some of the food vegans eat, and it doesn't look like it would lend itself to being cooked and held for a couple of hours; it looks more like it would turn into a slimy mass if you didn't eat it right away, and who'd want to eat that?

:)

Actually, many vegan products hold up a long time. Veggies and tofu are quite resilient.