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Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (1/22-2007 thru 12/14/2010) Donate to DU
 
Toasterlad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:55 AM
Original message
Dear Straight People
Today, at 10 AM PST, the California Supreme Court will hand down its decision re: same-sex marriage. It is expected that the Court will uphold Prop 8, and that same-sex marriage will remain illegal in California. If this is the case, please refrain from visiting the GLBT forum and responding to the undoubtedly many angry posts with condescending pleas for patience or understanding. Or, if the anger shifts to the national stage, please avoid chiming in with any half-assed defense of the Administration, the Pentagon, Congress, et al. Please be sensitive to our anger, and allow us at least a day to vent. If you wish to commiserate with us, or express your own outrage at Prop 8 and/or bigotry in general, please feel free. But PLEASE, if you only wish to contribute self-serving "advice" about being patient and explain to us the roadblocks between us and equality, don't. Show some class, and give us time to ourselves.

Conversely, if the Court surprises us and overturns Prop 8, please refrain from speculation (again, in the GLBT forum) about what a liability this may be to Democrats in the future, or how this victory shouldn't allow us to expect anything on a federal level. Again, if you wish to share our joy and optimism, please feel free. If not, kindly do not visit the GLBT forum today.

To those of you with the inevitable refrain of "This is a discussion board, and you can't tell me what I can or can't discuss"; you're right. I can't tell you, and I'm not. I'm ASKING you.

Please show some tact.

Thank you.
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HarukaTheTrophyWife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:56 AM
Response to Original message
1. K&R
I'm not holding my breath that people will heed your excellent OP.
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:57 AM
Response to Original message
2. +1
Just so you know though, the vast majority of real Dems on this site support you.

And, you guys have waited long enough. It's well past time.
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Toasterlad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:29 AM
Original message
.
:hug:
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Vickers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:57 AM
Response to Original message
3. Dear Gay People
Okey dokey.



:P

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Richardo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:57 AM
Response to Original message
4. K&R
A reasonable request. :patriot:

Keeping fingers crossed.
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bigscott Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:57 AM
Response to Original message
5. way to go Toaster
I could not have said it better myself - I was thinking of taking a couple days off from DU just so I did not have to read all the "be patient, you can go to Iowa" emails - or (even worse) the "are you happy now? you just cost us the 2010 elections" emails

peace
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YOY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:58 AM
Response to Original message
6. I'm straight but I hope you don't mind If I to tell you guys to keep up the fight no matter what.
Edited on Tue May-26-09 11:02 AM by YOY
n.t.
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Toasterlad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:24 AM
Response to Reply #6
29. Not At All. We Welcome Allies. Thank You For Your Support.
I was really only speaking to the small minority who consider it great fun to piss on GLBT threads and chastise us for our anger.
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DaDeacon Donating Member (494 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 01:37 PM
Response to Reply #6
46. I did that after prop 8 was passed...
I was told that I was "kicking people while they were down!' Best just to chill for a day or two.
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WeDidIt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:58 AM
Response to Original message
7. I hope the court does the right thing
If they don't, I'll help fight for what's right.

The time is now. This cannot stand. It's sick to allow a simple majority (barely) take away rights from a minority.
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liberal N proud Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:59 AM
Response to Original message
8. You will not hear a thing from me
Hope you are surprised by the decision.
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:00 AM
Response to Original message
9. You're not alone and your outrage is more than justified.
I remain with you, even as one of your own, here on DU, saw fit to suggest she wished not to have my support.
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cali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:00 AM
Response to Original message
10. straw man (mostly)
Edited on Tue May-26-09 11:03 AM by cali
the vast and I mean vast majority of us straight folks here strongly and overwhelmingly support marriage equality and hate, hate, hate prop 8. we want it overturned. we fear that it won't be. I usually am very careful about speaking for others. In this case, I have no hesitation. I know that DUers are pro marriage equality. In any case, it's against site rules to oppose it.

I understand your sensitivity but you have far more supporters here than detractors. That should be something you feel good about
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book_worm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:02 AM
Response to Reply #10
12. Agreed.
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:03 AM
Response to Reply #10
13. True, but a lot of the detractors have very big mouths.
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cali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:04 AM
Response to Reply #13
16. there just aren't a lot of detractors
fortunately. Nor do I see them speaking out against marriage equality. it's a tombstonable offence in any case.
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:12 AM
Response to Reply #16
21. We must be reading a different website.
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cali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #21
33. well, scour the site for current posts. there are several threads
prop 8 and the coming decision. I have yet to see anything but support for overturning prop 8 and for marriage equlity.
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spiritual_gunfighter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 01:15 AM
Response to Reply #21
66. I have never read one post, not one
coming out against gay marriage. Strawman indeed.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 09:30 AM
Response to Reply #16
78. just because you are not sensitive to something doesnt mean it doesnt exist
it likely just means its not that important to you.

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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:05 AM
Response to Reply #13
18. Unlike a lot of places on Earth...
Edited on Tue May-26-09 11:05 AM by JuniperLea
The squeaky wheel doesn't get the most grease around here. We are all used to the loud minority that is the Republican'tseemtogettheiracttogether party.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:03 AM
Response to Reply #10
14. Well said...
Agreed.
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Toasterlad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:21 AM
Response to Reply #10
28. It's Not An Argument. It's a Plea.
I'm well aware that the majority of DUers favor same-sex marriage, and I generally DO feel good about that. I am just hoping to not hear today from the few people who invariably find it necessary to "explain" things to the GLBT community, especially when something doesn't go our way.
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csziggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:01 AM
Response to Original message
11. No matter which way it goes, I'll be on the GLBT side
Because even if Prop 8 is overturned, my state, Florida, still has their anti-equal rights asshole law in place to withhold rights from just GLBT people. And that needs to be overturned, too.
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Tim01 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:04 AM
Response to Original message
15. I support your right to get married. Keep up the fight.
You will just have to keep at it.
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votingupstart Donating Member (535 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:12 AM
Response to Reply #15
22. absolutely correct nt
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hlthe2b Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:04 AM
Response to Original message
17. I understand...
I just hope things remain peaceful on the ground in California (regardless the outcome)and calm leads to smart focused strategy if the decision is a disappointment.
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Terran Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:48 AM
Response to Reply #17
35. I hear that barricades have been set up in the Castro...
It's going to be an emotional day, whichever way it goes.
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konnichi wa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:06 AM
Response to Original message
19. What you said.
:kick:
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OPERATIONMINDCRIME Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:11 AM
Response to Original message
20. Anyone Who Isn't Outraged If It Is Upheld Or Empathetic To The GLBT'ers Anger About It, Should Even
be allowed to be members here imho.
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Hepburn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 03:15 PM
Response to Reply #20
47. +1
That is exactly how I feel ~~ if you are here, you need to support equal rights for EVERYONE!

:hi:
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musicblind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 02:17 AM
Response to Reply #47
67. +2
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Jack Bone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:12 AM
Response to Original message
23. K&R.....nt
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Bluenorthwest Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:15 AM
Response to Original message
24. Yep.
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Starry Messenger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:16 AM
Response to Original message
25. k&r
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myrna minx Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:16 AM
Response to Original message
26. K&R n/t
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AngryAmish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:18 AM
Response to Original message
27. okaly-dokaly
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helderheid Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:25 AM
Response to Original message
30. You got it. Hey, Mercury is still retrograde - perfect time to overturn it!!
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CreekDog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:29 AM
Response to Original message
31. It's never a good time to tell people they have to wait for their civil rights
Edited on Tue May-26-09 11:31 AM by CreekDog
:thumbsdown:

oh and K&R. :hi:
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meegbear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:30 AM
Response to Original message
32. K & R
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krabigirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:41 AM
Response to Original message
34. :( This straight person hopes you are wrong and it will be overturned!!!
And if not, I will be really fucking pissed. Since when do we put the rights of others up to a majority vote?
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Dogtown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:50 AM
Response to Original message
36. Respect n/t
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JitterbugPerfume Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:53 AM
Response to Original message
37. you are entitled to some understanding!
this whole thing is breaking my heart.
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Neecy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:57 AM
Response to Original message
38. I'll just add this....
When we hear silence from the White House on the Prop 8 ruling, be assured we'll have an opinion on this. If I read the word 'poutrage' even once I'll go ballistic.
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Faux pas Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:05 PM
Response to Original message
39. Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness! No one should be
denied the basics. :grouphug:
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ohheckyeah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:19 PM
Response to Original message
40. You'll get nothing but support from me. n/t
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omega minimo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:25 PM
Response to Original message
41. "Show some class"
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:26 PM
Response to Original message
42. Kick
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ourbluenation Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:28 PM
Response to Original message
43. The Courage Campaign is telling people to roll up their shirtsleeves NOW!
NO waiting a day to process frustration. I'm straight and I'm ready to get to work for equality right now. Try and stop me.
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Toasterlad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:38 PM
Response to Reply #43
45. I Won't Stop You. Thanks.
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jobycom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 12:30 PM
Response to Original message
44. I guess this will make me a bad person...
But I'm kicking you! (and recommending).
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cascadiance Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:50 PM
Response to Original message
48. I'm a straight guy who posted one of the first threads on this decision this morning...
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=102&topic_id=3893289&mesg_id=3893289

Damn right I think you/we should be talking about it, as majority rule being overturned by a majority completely destroys the meaning of our Bill of Rights!...

I also have other issues too that I view as important (the torture mess, state secrets privilege, single payer health care, our new SCOTUS selection and how well she will help bring down corporate power, etc.). I hope that you can also join me in helping bring attention to those as well, which are also immensely important!
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Mike 03 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 04:55 PM
Response to Original message
49. Yeah, I have a belief that you don't make the same mistake twice. Back in November
I remember posting that I was irritated by the focus on Prop 8 when we Dems had just had such a huge victory with Obama.

But it took me about three days to put myself in the shoes of the GLBT community, re-evaluate my callousness on that issue, and remember (memories that were sometimes painful) the immense debt that I and members of my family owe members of this community.

I posted to death on that and don't want to bore anyone here with a repeat of my debts and gratitudes.

The bottom line, I think, is that if we here at DU are proponents of what is right, what is Constitutional, and what is fair, we have no choice but to not only "suffer" but participate in this discussion.

If this were the 1960s, would we ignore the complaints of African Americans re: subjugation of their rights?

OF course not.

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destes Donating Member (246 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 10:24 AM
Response to Reply #49
81. "If this were the 1960s,"
"would we ignore the complaints of African Americans re: subjugation of their rights?"

No. If this were the 1960's, after passage of the civil rights act, we'd sit back in our smugness, congratulating ourselves for helping those "colored" people. We would be blissfully blind as the bigoted-ignorant-reactionary core of American society is Shanghaied into the Republican party to re-emerge as a neo-con force which rapes the middle class into serfdom. We'd make grand speeches on MLK day while the traitorous GOP ensures the de facto regeneration of Jim Crow by lowering everyone's individual economic potential, completing our social disintegration.

I'm 100% for everyone's unregulated exercise of their individual rights and liberties. But when you are near a victory that goes against the grain of so many, with issues similar to those of the civil rights era, you can count on the disgruntled to exercise their rights too. We are as divided a nation, even along racial lines, as we were then because of this phenomenon.
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tbyg52 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 05:23 PM
Response to Original message
50. I got through the work day without crying, barely.
I am so, so sorry and so, so angry.
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Ikonoklast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 05:28 PM
Response to Original message
51. Dear Gay People
Don't give up. This ain't nowhere near over. Just a skirmish on the way to the real battle.


Straight Guy.



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Chemisse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 05:38 PM
Response to Original message
52. I feel for all you couples out there who are suffering today.
We are all diminished when we deprive some people of their rights. (Isn't there a famous quote along these lines?)

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Wednesdays Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 05:42 PM
Response to Original message
53. K&R
:kick:
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JNelson6563 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 06:08 PM
Response to Original message
54. If this decision had gone the correct way
I can't imagine feeling anything but joy. Since it's gone the wrong way I am sickened, disappointed, discouraged and feeling like I'd sure like a way to offer comfort to all of our gay friends.

Julie
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CLANG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 09:38 PM
Response to Original message
55. Very tactful plea.
I think the vote and the ruling were both travesties.
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Bucky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 09:43 PM
Response to Original message
56. Straight people aren't the problem here.
It's the bigots who hate the idea of full civil rights for all Americans who are the problem.
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yewberry Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 09:54 PM
Response to Original message
57. Dear Toasterlad
Be mad. Be hurt. Be yourself.

And believe that you are valued as part of the larger community for all you are and all you bring. I don't know how to harness the support for the GLBT community that we need--but the support is here.

Thanks for your common sense in this post...kind of wish people wouldn't need it, but, there you go.

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Toasterlad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:07 PM
Response to Reply #57
58. Thank You. Aside From 1 or 2 posts, People Have Been Overwhelmingly Supportive and Gracious.
Edited on Tue May-26-09 10:26 PM by Toasterlad
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yewberry Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:12 PM
Response to Reply #58
59. Shocking.
But good.

We're with you, I swear to god we are.
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omega minimo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 11:00 PM
Response to Reply #58
63. Every subgroup should put out a disclaimer/warning as excellent as yours
:thumbsup:
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Jennicut Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 01:09 AM
Response to Reply #58
65. I support you totally. This ruling disappointed me but we have to keep fighting.
States are starting to fall one by one. I live in CT so I know this is possible in other states, I just really want to believe that. I am a straight person who supports you fully.
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rucky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:22 PM
Response to Original message
60. I have no intention of showing tact.
I'm right there with the marchers on Van Ness. Anyone with half a heart is pissed off right now, and has every right to be.
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tabbycat31 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:40 PM
Response to Original message
61. K&R
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mnhtnbb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-26-09 10:43 PM
Response to Original message
62. As I have said many times previously on DU, I hope to be the mother of the groom
at the weddings of both my sons--gay and straight--someday, should they both be so lucky as to find
the love of their life and wish to get married.
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heliarc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 01:05 AM
Response to Original message
64. Damn straight... so to speak...
There should be absolute intolerance of discrimination and I have no patience for it.
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 02:21 AM
Response to Original message
68. I am always with you Toasterlad
yes indeed
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jeff30997 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 02:34 AM
Response to Original message
69. Warmly recommended.

Keep up the good fight.:hug:

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TheWatcher Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 02:52 AM
Response to Original message
70. Could not reccommend this HIGHER.
Edited on Wed May-27-09 02:52 AM by TheWatcher
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tavalon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 04:19 AM
Response to Original message
71. Heck it would make no sense for me to be anything but supportive of gays
My sexual minority is waiting for you guys to get your equal rights so maybe we can slip in the door behind you.
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 06:53 AM
Response to Original message
72. well, this straight person has no problem with your post
:)
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Vidar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 06:58 AM
Response to Original message
73. Straight & in full agreement with you TL.
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Harry Monroe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 07:48 AM
Response to Original message
74. You're insulting my intelligence with this!!
I am as pissed as you are in that in this day and age, equal rights are not granted to ALL!! Patience my ass; it is beyond time that discrimination is overturned in this country!! As a straight married male, I stand with all GLBTs in fighting this injustice.
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Enthusiast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 08:39 AM
Response to Original message
75. K&R Dear gay people
Don't give up. I live in the Appalachian part of Ohio where bigotry traditionally runs deep. But on the gay issues I have seen a huge change in the younger people. It came as a shock to me, actually. However, these same ones that have gained a new and refreshing attitude toward gays still can't get over the perception that progressives want to take their guns away.
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Deep13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 09:03 AM
Response to Original message
76. I'm sure some well-meaning people urged MLK to exercise restraint and moderation...
...while their supporters were being lynched.
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 09:26 AM
Response to Original message
77. Well I'm absolutely disgusted
that the ruling went down the way it did.

I was almost positive the California SC would show some sense and reverse Prop 8.

Goddamned fundy assholes and their stupidass justifications for denying equal rights to a whole group of people in the first place.

fuck them. Like someone else said, keep up the fight.



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Enrique Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 09:32 AM
Response to Original message
79. I think you can take it
you're strong people, you can take the 0.0001% of posts which advise you in that way you don't like.
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solara Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 10:23 AM
Response to Original message
80. I am sickened and discouraged by this "decision" - equal rights mean just that!
I am with you and have always been. This tiny -minded, bigoted travesty of ignorant, self-righteous meddling simply cannot stand!

:patriot:


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redwitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-27-09 10:26 AM
Response to Original message
82. This New Yorker is astounded that my state and yours aren't over this by now.
It being the 21st century and all. Other straight friends have said to me, patience, it's gonna happen eventually. Patience? Most of my gay friends are in their 50's. They've waited all their lives and are out of patience.

Our friends went to MA 2 months ago and tied the knot in a beautiful ceremony. We went to be a part of it and it was so joyful. I am clueless as to why anyone would be opposed to a loving couple getting basic civil rights in the US.

I am deeply sorry for the heartbreak this is causing.
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