37 things worse than a KFC meatwich by Mark Morford

37 things worse than a KFC meatwich
By Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist

Friday, April 16, 2010


And lo, the reaction was swift and true, an incredible flood of comment and reply, recoil and horrified laughter, in response to last week's column -- and the Huffington Post's wondrous reprint -- on the gut-clenching KFC meat phenomenon/abomination known as the Double Down.

But amongst the amazement and wonder, a few oxygen-deprived souls dared to write in to say, "Aww c'mon, it's not all that bad? There are far worse things out there, for sure." And then they proceeded to try and prove how the DD's noxious calorie and fat numbers aren't even as toxic as some other vile fast foodstuffs, completely ignoring the larger picture I was delineating -- all the pollution, animal abuse, industrial farming, chemicals, synthetics, antibiotics, hormones and just plain insidiousness of a company concocting something this greasy and disgusting in the modern age.

But it got me thinking, aside from the food porn on thisiswhyyourefat.com, well, just what are those things that are worse for you than KFC's fistful of karmic hate? What else can you shove into your body, your brain, your very anima itself, if you really despise yourself, stopped caring long ago and just want to curl up and die in a corner somewhere? Shall we list a few? Let's.

1) Tea Party Rally. Recently did I stumble, like stepping on a rusty nail, across a surreal clip of Sarah "Queen of Duh" Palin rallying the "troops" at a Tea Party Express stop somewhere in Gunlick, Kentuckansasiana, and I found my mind suddenly blasted clean by the giant pile of dumb I was witnessing, unable to pinpoint exactly what it was that this circus sideshow reminded me of.

Then I had it. Remember that bizarre, 30-second acid trip of a scene in "The Wizard of Oz," the moment just before a very stoned Dorothy skips away to hook up with her crazy gay pals and traipse through a giant Pink Floyd album, the moment when those three adult dwarves stumble out of the Munchkinland horde wearing little kid outfits, and sing their little surly song, replete with surly, out-of-sync-leg spasms? Yes, the Palin-led Tea Party rally reminded me of the Lollipop Guild, serenading Dorothy. Perfect.


more...
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2010/04/16/notes041610.DTL

which, given the hue and cry going on over a goddamned fast food product, must be what the hand-wringers are afraid of.

Amazing how, for example, I get to smell people's shit-smelling cigarette smoke because of their freedoms, but we have a pop cultural meltdown over a meat bomb that only hurts the idiots who eat them.